This is a hard questions because I don't have a great, do-what-I-do method! I am a organizational freak, though, and I don't have excess storage space so my short answer is...I only allow what will fit in the dressers and closets. If it doesn't have a place, it doesn't stay. (This doesn't include the out-of-season clothes that we store in our shed and in my parents' attic.)
The majority of my children's clothes are hand-me-downs from relatives and friends so we tend to have bits and pieces and not everything has a match. When determining what items to put in the dresser for the season, I ask myself 3 things.
Do I like it? Just because it is free doesn't mean I'm obligated to keep it.
Does (s)he have something to wear with it? Plaid shorts are cute, but if all we have are striped shirts, the shorts have to go.
Do we need it? This is more relative because I'm not above keeping ten dresses simply because I like them. (My girls love dresses so I can justify it.) I'm also not opposed to keeping a few more boys' shirts than I think we need just in case one of them has a run in with a mud puddle. But it I'm out of space and someone gives us another pair of shorts, something (either the new item or something else in the drawer) has to go.
One last thing: before filling the drawers for the season, I lay each child's clothing in the floor and pair things up or group them according to what matches. If I see a gap in the wardrobe-- no jeans, for example-- I'll add it to the list of things to buy. If I see an overabundance-- five sweaters, for example-- I'll weed it out.
How do you determine the size of your child's wardrobe? Let us know in the comments.
Also, if you have a question for a future "How Do You...?" post, share that in the comments, too, or send me an e-mail! I'd love to hear from you.
Last month, I talked about why we take a summer break from school and I promised I would also talk about my homeschooling method. I never thought much about my "method" at all until this year. Well, let me clarify. I'd given it thought, but I never thought about what to call it. It wasn't until I had conversations with two different friends who were trying to settle on their own family's homeschooling method that I said, "What do I call our method?"
I was stumped.
Before we began formal schooling five years ago, I knew that it was important to me that the majority of our learning be done
together so that it eased the pressure of me trying to direct multiple kids while still caring for younger ones. I
also wanted most of our learning to be done from "real" books, not
textbooks. I also felt it important that our
learning be natural and not forced. I wanted to guide my kids by their ability, not by what they "should" be learning at a particular age. I wanted them to love learning.
Much of what we do can be considered Charlotte Mason method. We draw in nature journals, we study works of art and beautiful music, we read poetry, and we read scads of living books. We do a bit of narration in lieu of grades and quizzes, though I have one child who thrives on letter grades (and will put a grade on his own papers if I don't). Sometimes we do projects or activities like you would do with unit studies and sometimes we take a topic and run with it like with unschooling and sometimes we even use a textbook.
I still don't have a name for our eclectic jumble of methods, but I'm not sure it matters. Maybe doing what works for us and being willing to adapt when a change is needed doesn't need a official moniker.
Do you use a homeschooling method...or do you mix it all up like I do?
For some reason, I've been drawn to memoirs this summer. Without really realizing, I've read several modern memoirs back to back (to back to back). I find it hard to critique a memoir because while each one has been, at times, fascinating, heartbreaking, touching, and hilarious...each also has elements that make me cringe. Whether it be bad language, differing life philosophies, or opposing religious beliefs, I have to remind myself (and you, if you choose to read one of the following books) that I cannot expect the lost to act found.
So... read with fascination, but also read with warning.
Unorthodox by Deborah Feldman was written by a young, 20-something woman who entered an arranged marriage and had a child before leaving her strict, Hasidic Jewish community in New York City. She shares details of her life from the time she was a small child, abandoned by both parents, to her first year on her own in a new world. While I was so into this book that I couldn't put it down, I was saddened by the conclusions she made about God.
Heaven Is Here by Stephanie Nielson was written by a young mom about my age who was raising four young children when she was badly burned in a private plane crash. This book chronicles her life before and after the crash, delving into her feelings towards her new "look" and feelings of guilt and inadequacy in the months when she was unable to see or care for her children. This book was also riveting, but her religious views, though only a minor element of the book, were very different from my own.
Bloom by Kelle Hampton recounts the minutes and days and months after the author birthed a baby daughter with Down's Syndrome. She shares her periods of mourning and grief and how she changed her thinking to embrace joy. Filled with page after page of color photographs, the visual element of the book was almost as interesting as the text, but the conversational language was rougher than I would prefer.
I hesitate to mention this book at all. Arms Wide Open: A Midwife's Journey by Patricia Harman follows the author through her early years of learning to be midwife. A self-proclaimed hippie, her accounts of life on a commune with a loose-moral standard was bothersome. This book is the sequel to The Blue Cotton Gown: A Midwife's Memoir , a chronicle of the author's current life as a nurse-midwife which I enjoyed infinitely more, but was also rougher than my normals reads.
Next on my list are Two Kisses for Maddy by Matthew Logelin and Dan Gets a Minivan by Dan Zevin. If anyone has read either and can shed some light on them, please do so!
My girls get a little thrill in dressing alike. My boys don't care what they wear as long as it's comfortable, but the girls have different criteria. Cute is the name of the game. Still, with one child in 2T and the other in 10/12, it's near impossible to find them matching anything (with the exception of these matching Goodwill dresses)!
I was inspired again by these PDF templates. Maddie had an extra hot pink T-shirt in her drawer and I found a $3 one at Walmart for Alaine so I went to work on easy matching bird shirts, using the same technique that I used on Alaine's cupcake T-shirt . I decided to choose different fabrics for their birds so they would coordinate but not match exactly.
Our 8yo lies constantly!! No matter how minor/major the subject (grabbing an extra cookie, leaving her shoes out, hitting her brother, etc.), she lies about it. She lies because she doesn't want to get into trouble, yet she gets into even more trouble for the lie. How do we get this fact to sink into her, and how do we 100% stop the lying all together?
I believe lying is a heart issue. Even if I could force my child to stop lying, if she is only stopping because she has to and not because she knows it is wrong, the problem will still fester under the surface.
That being said, when a child has inappropriate behavior, there must be consequences. In our house, we know that consistency is key. No matter how many times we have to correct a misdeed and how discouraging it feels when the lesson seems to not be sinking in, we try to keep on the same track. We're currently dealing with picking and fighting after we put our two youngest boys to bed. Every night, we tuck them in with kisses, giggles and prayers. Right before we leave the room, we remind them of the rules of bedtime: no loud talking, no touching, no tickling. And every single night, at least one boy pushes the limits so every single night, either Brian or I has to go back into the room to correct them and issue consequences.
Sometimes I want to give up, separate the two of them, and be done with it, but I know that is only a short-term solution. They need to learn to abstain from their sinful behavior!
I have never had a habitual liar among my children, but often enough a disagreement will break out and I'll be given two conflicting sides of a story. I urge both parties to tell the truth and share the true details of what happened. Many times, though, neither child will change their story and I am unable to decipher who is telling the truth. At those times I give a speech like this: "I'm so sad that someone is not telling the truth. I can't know who that person is, but Jesus knows. If you are the one telling the lie, I want you to realize that even though Mama doesn't know what happened, He does."
How do you deal with lying in your household? Let us know in the comments.
Also, if you have a question for a future "How Do You...?" post, share that in the comments, too, or send me an e-mail! I'd love to hear from you.
We're pleased to welcome another Guest T.I.P.ster this week! Jillian from Hi! It's Jilly will be sharing her ideas for Quick and Easy Summer Meals, along with the regular T.I.P.ster hosts, Allyson, Christy, and me.
At our house, dinner time is a potentially stressful time. The 1-year-old and 3-year-old who napped wake up hungry. The 5-year-old who doesn't nap is nearing bedtime. Brian has worked such crazy hours this year that we only expect him for dinner about 1-2 nights a week. When meal planning this summer, I look for recipes that meet a couple criteria.
1) Everyone (or almost everyone) likes the dish. Persuading a picky eater is not on my to-do list when I'm the only adult at home. Our go-to meals are things like spaghetti, pancakes and eggs, grilled cheese, tacos, or creamy mac and cheese.
2) The recipe is either quick to throw together in the late afternoon, can be prepared ahead of time in the morning, OR can be prepared as a family event.
Summer Stromboli
One of our favorite summer (or year-round!) meals is stromboli. I prepare the crust after lunch and let it rise on the counter all afternoon (though if you are short of time, it really only needs a short time to rise). I got this crust recipe from my sister-in-law, Sarah, and we use it for everything from pizza to stromboli to breadsticks.
Mix 2 cups of flour with 4 1/2 teaspoons (2 pkg.) of yeast. Add 2 cups
of warm water and 3 tablespoons of olive oil. Mix well, then add 2 more
cups of flour. Add an additional 1-2 cups of flour until dough forms a
soft, slightly sticky ball. Finish kneading with your hands. Cover and
let rise.
Then I gather the troops and we assemble the strombolis together to our own personal liking. When I know stromboli is on the menu plan, I tend to squirrel away bits of things in the freezer for filling: chopped green pepper leftover from salads, leftover ham, crumbles of bulk sausage...
Divide dough into 6-7 individual balls. Liberally coat your work surface with flour and roll out each ball into a circle. Spread with sauce (thick or thin, depending on your preference). Sprinkle with Parmesan cheese and oregano. Top with mozzarella cheese and desired toppings. Fold over, sealing all the seams. Move to a greased baking pan. Brush with melted butter and sprinkle with garlic salt. Bake for 12 minutes at 425 degrees.
As always...take a moment to visit my fellow T.I.P.sters,
Beginning last June, we set off on a quest to read aloud any Beverly Cleary book we could get our hands on. We've almost completed the list, but we're taking a breather to sample another author. As much as I've loved her writing, I am slightly weary of it! I've been asked which books I recommend and where to start. Below is my quick guide to Beverly Cleary:
The Ralph S. Mouse books were actually the first chapter books I ever read aloud to my kids, back in 2006 when Gavin was not-quite 4 and Maddie was a napping 2-year-old.
Last summer, the Ramona books were where we began. They were the first chapter books that had ever fully engaged (then) 4-year-old Owen. The series follows Ramona from a mischievous, annoying preschooler to a maturing fifth grader. My children still assign characters and "play" Ramona.
We moved on to Henry in the winter. The Henry books are all boy! Though they still engaged Maddie, my boys loved and related to the the mud and fishing and bike riding fun most of all.
Next we started in on the stand-alone novels. This is where we currently stand, with only 2 more to go. I'm not sure which character was more beloved: Socks, the kitten who feels displaced by the new baby in the house, ballet-dancer Ellen, or the teasing Otis Spofford. I think it depends which of my children you ask.
Amongst all the chapter book reading, we also sampled Beverly Cleary's picture books about the toddler twins who have gentle, everyday adventures. These are easily read in one sitting.
Beverly Cleary wrote several novels for older girls, but since I didn't think my children would enjoy stories of weddings and dating and mushy stuff, we chose to skip these for now.
There were two more stand-alone novels that we chose to skip. Both deal with divorce and since this wasn't a topic I wanted my children to be fully exposed to, we passed.
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*****
Allyson is our latest entry in the The Challenge. She added a fabric layer to her toddler's skirt to make it longer and more modest. To see more pictures and read how she did it, click on the photo below:
Is your entry ready for The Dress Project? I'm excited to see what you can come up with. Two prizes are now up for grabs and with only two entries, they both have a 100% of winning!
How do you teach sharing to your preschool crowd? Lately we've been struggling with sharing and kids fighting over toys. We have an almost 5-year-old [boy] and a 20-month old [girl]. She is
learning what sharing means and he is learning how to manage his
frustration with a grabby little sister. Any advice you have is great.
submitted by Katie
Sharing is a difficult concept for young children. It's also hard as parents to help our children learn what sharing really means. I try to think in adult terms before I work with my children.
Pretend I am eating a piece of chocolate cake. You come to my house and think it looks good. Do you then have the right to take my cake and eat it just because you want it? No one says to me, "Eat just one more bite and then give your guest the rest of your slice of cake."
Another example: I buy a pillow for my sofa. You come over and sit on my sofa and lean against the pillow. Do I snatch it out from behind your back because it is my pillow?
I try to use the same principles with my children as I help them work out their sharing woes. I let them know that if they were playing with a particular toy, they do not have to give it up simply because a sibling wants it, too. I do suggest that when they are done, it would be polite to pass it along to the next person who wants a turn.
When dealing with toys or books that are family-owned, I stress that everyone has the right to use them and enjoy them. When dealing with toys or books belong to a particular child, I am sensitive to ownership. Just because Gavin is not playing with his Legos doesn't mean Owen is free to pick them up and take apart what Gavin built. Regardless of the circumstances or who is in the right or wrong, I allow no snatching and no throwing. That automatically makes the once-innocent child share in the guilt.
I've found that with little children, I have to do most of the thinking and reasoning for them. They do not understand the concept of sharing. They only understand the law of selfishness. It takes many years of consistency before children begin understand and appreciate sharing.
How do you work on sharing with your children? Let us know in the comments.
Also, if you have a question for a future "How Do You...?" post, share that in the comments, too, or send me an e-mail! I'd love to hear from you.
I've been in multiple conversations with friends and other bloggers this summer about homeschool philosophy and why each of us make the decisions we do for our homeschooling families. (These are all happy conversations, by the way, not debates!)
One of the decisions Brian and I purposefully made for our family is to take a break from school in the summer. Though I know many families who choose to school year round and love it, we have chosen a break for these reasons:
1) I enjoy a different routine in the summer. There are various activities that only happen in the summer-- library events, $1 movies, beach trips, sleepovers with grandparents, Bible school, horse camp-- and that altered schedule keeps us busy enough without trying to fit school into the cracks.
2) The summer gives me a chance to evaluate our curriculum. Is this math program working? Do we still need focus on phonics? Are there holes in our learning? Summer allows me a chance to step back and see what is working (or not)... and make a plan before we begin again in August.
3) I love a sense of closure. Though we don't always finish every book by the end of the school year, we make goals and when we put our pencils down in the spring, things feel complete. When we begin again after our break, we start new.
4) Summer is an opportunity to focus on learning that might not happen during the formal school year. This summer, we're learning all about the human body for health. (I guess that means that technically, we're not out of school after all, but the learning is informal and the kids don't think this is school.)
Do you school year round or take a break in the summer? How did you come to that decision?
by Deborah Feldman was written by a young, 20-something woman who entered an arranged marriage and had a child before leaving her strict, Hasidic Jewish community in New York City. She shares details of her life from the time she was a small child, abandoned by both parents, to her first year on her own in a new world. While I was so into this book that I couldn't put it down, I was saddened by the conclusions she made about God. 
by Stephanie Nielson was written by a young mom about my age who was raising four young children when she was badly burned in a private plane crash. This book chronicles her life before and after the crash, delving into her feelings towards her new "look" and feelings of guilt and inadequacy in the months when she was unable to see or care for her children. This book was also riveting, but her religious views, though only a minor element of the book, were very different from my own.
by Kelle Hampton recounts the minutes and days and months after the author birthed a baby daughter with Down's Syndrome. She shares her periods of mourning and grief and how she changed her thinking to embrace joy. Filled with page after page of color photographs, the visual element of the book was almost as interesting as the text, but the conversational language was rougher than I would prefer. 
by Patricia Harman follows the author through her early years of learning to be midwife. A self-proclaimed hippie, her accounts of life on a commune with a loose-moral standard was bothersome. This book is the sequel to 
which I enjoyed infinitely more, but was also rougher than my normals reads. 
by Matthew Logelin and 
by Dan Zevin. If anyone has read either and can shed some light on them, please do so! 
(and 
which actually comes first) that I downloaded for free on my Kindle. 
