Making a List and Checking It Twice

Okay.  So Christmas is over, but around the New Year, we all start making new lists.  To-do lists.  Book lists. Grocery lists.  School lists.  Resolutions lists? 

I stopped making resolutions because resolutions seemed doomed to fail.  Instead, I like goals. The word goal indicates that I'm working toward something, even if I don't quite get there.  

Today I'm looking back on some of the goals I made at the the beginning of 2013.  Most I completed.  Some I didn't and a few I'm still working on.  Next Wednesday, I'll post a fresh list of goals for 2014. 

Goals For 2013 (in semi-particular order):

• Print 10-15 baby pictures of Alaine to include in her photo album  Thanks to a great Walgreens deal, I accomplished this early in the year.
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
• Attempt some of the ideas on my Winter Pinterest Board (a few pictures of my projects here)
  
  
• Work on the walls
  
  1. Have the 3 boys paint pieces of abstract art for their bedroom wall
  
  
  
  
  2. Make a large photo poster for our living room wall
  
  
  
  
  
  3. Update some of our  frames with more current photos
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
• Finish moving our books from boxes to shelves
  
  
  
  
  
• Learn to change the oil in van...and maybe the wiper blades, too  Never learned how to do either one, but I'll be rolling this goal over into 2014. I did learn to operate a chainsaw.
  
  
  
  
  
  
• Potty train Alaine I hadn't intended to work on this until spring, but some things in life don't wait! I shared a few details here. I shared in that same post that the only problem we were having was that we were not able to night train at the same time as day train like we had done with our first four kids.  I need not have worried.  Within another week or so, Alaine asked to start wearing undies at night, too, and she hasn't looked back!  For the first time in over ten years, we stopped buying diapers. 
  
  
  
  
• Spring clean the house using this plan  I scrapped this altogether because I found myself cleaning things just to check them off a list and feeling guilty if I missed a day.  Instead, I stuck to my regular light cleaning routine and did more heavy duty cleaning if we were expecting company.
  
  
• Run a 5K!  I ran a 2 mile race as a warm-up and then I complete 4 other 5Ks here, here, here and here!
  
  
  
  

  
  
  
  
  
• Work with the kids on responsibility and finishing tasks to completion This is still a work in progress, but once we formulated a plan, the kids began to take more responsibility for their own work, plus they learned a lot of new skills-- laundry, changing light bulbs, washing the car, taking out the trash-- in the process!  
  
  

• Compile the kids' portfolios for their school records Compiling the portfolios was easier this time as I kept up with our records all year long.  We had a bunch of friends (5 moms, 10 kids) over to review everyone's portfolios for our umbrella school... and then I breathed a sigh of relief.
  
• Finish the e-book I'm writing by the first week of June You can still access my free reading guide for families here.  Good reading doesn't need to stop when summer is over!
  
  
  
  
  
• Plan our 2013-2014 school year  I shared my curriculum choices here, here, and here.
  
  
  
  
  
  
• Give The Dress  a radical new design for fall I did it!  I remade The Dress in April and I redesigned it once again in September, but I also started to face the reality that I'm tired of that dress now.
  
  
  
  

  
  
  
  
• Finish the preparation for my October blog series, 31 Days, 31 Printables  Click on button below to access the entire series.
  
  
  
  
  
  
• Do a  push-up (I've never had the upper body strength to do even 1!) and hold a plank for 60 seconds I still can't do a push-up, but I took the 30 Day Plank Challenge in November.  I got stuck on Day 22 (holding a plank for 180 seconds), but I try again every few days and I'm almost there.  A 160 second plank still far surpasses my goal! 
  
  
  
• Have a date night with Brian (at home or out) once a month  Whether we were able to go out or had to improvise at home, we had more than 12 dates in 2013!
  

• Continue to find ways to welcome people into our home  We had guests over at least a couple of times a month.  That included birthday parties, dinner guests, play dates, an Easter egg dyeing event, 2 Survivor viewing parties, a Mother's Day dinner, school review group, a Thanksgiving party, a New Years' Eve game night, and a before-Christmas visit from these 2 cuties.
  
  
  
  
  

Do you set goals at the start of a  new year?  Do you write them down or keep them informally?  Next Wednesday, I'll share my goal list for 2014!

Potty Training...Not Perfection, But Progress

Two weeks ago I talked about how we had begun to potty train Alaine.  I mentioned that my first four kids took about a week to train from start to finish and that we night trained at the same time.  

It would only be fair to mention that it's been a bit different this time.  

I wasn't totally ready to begin this venture.  I always find it easier to train in the warmer months when less clothing is involved, but Alaine began showing signs that she was ready, including asking to use the toilet.  At not quite 2½, she was younger than any of my other trainers, though Maddie had been only slightly older.  (The three boys were each +/- 3-years-old when they potty trained.) 

Maybe because she was younger or maybe because I was busy with four other children, but it took longer than a week for her master the whole potty routine-- recognizing the need to go, stopping her play, and getting to the potty!  About a week-and-a-half into it, I shared that we'd had three accidents in the space of one hour!  Brian noted that she seemed to take two steps forward before taking a step back again.  I had to consistently remind her to use the potty about every thirty minutes to ensure no accidents.  Sometimes she would have an accident but keep playing anyway without telling anyone.

Then suddenly it seemed to click.  On Thursday, thirteen days after potty training began, we had an accident-free day.  And then another and another and another and another.  Five dry days in a row!  We've had dry outings and success with public restrooms, too. 

My only dilemma now is that she can't seem to go the whole night without a diaper.  I've never night trained separately from day training so I'm at a loss.  Sometimes she wakes up dry, but not consistently enough to take the risk.  She does not nap at all during the day, but she sleeps almost twelve hours at night-- from roughly 7pm to 7 am.  I'm not even sure I could go that long between potty visits.   I've tried waking her before I go to bed, but she is always too groggy to use the bathroom.  Any ideas? 

The Many Faces of Potty Training

The potty trainers at our house fell into distinct categories.  While the basic method of training was the same for all, their individual personalities dictated how we went about it, as well as the timing and speed. 

Gavin (our first potty trainer) was the Don't Care Trainer.  He was content to use diapers and was content to walk around in wet underwear.  Messes didn't bother him so he had no personal incentive to use the toilet.  We attempted several times to train him before he turned three, but ended up frustrated each time.  Finally, we developed a method that worked rather quickly.  We brought the potty chair into our main living area for a few days.  We had him sit on it about twice an hour at first.  We had him sit so frequently that he didn't have time to wet between potty visits.  Each time he was successful, we rewarded him with an M&M.  Before long, he caught on and realized what he was supposed to do and we were able to move the potty chair back to the bathroom.  We night trained him at the same time and because he was so concious of what he needed to do during the day, it carried over into the nighttime hours. 

Maddie (our second potty trainer) was the Guns Blazing Trainer.  Being only 19.5 months younger than Gavin, she was already 18 months when he began potty training.  She immediately began showing an interest herself.  She was also an early talker and could express her needs well.  We had a period of days where she used the potty as often as Gavin did, but she was not very consistent.   One morning after her second birthday she sat at the breakfast table and declared, "I'm going to wear panties today,"  and she didn't look back.  It was just that easy!  We reminded her multiple times during the day to use the toilet, but once she decided to do it, she did.  Because she was so eager, we chose to train her directly on the adult toilet and not use a potty chair.

Owen (our third potty trainer) was the Reluctant (and Fearful) Trainer.  I was very apprehensive about training him because he was so terrified of the whole bathroom idea.  He was afraid to sit on the toilet.  He was afraid of the flushing sound.  He was afraid to wash his hands under running water.  He was afraid to even walk into a public restroom.  The whole idea terrified him...and terrified me!  A month after his third birthday, though, he developed a severe diaper rash that left him in so much pain, he limped when he walked.  I knew we were just going to have to go for it so on Saturday, I told him that starting Monday, he was done with diapers.  He was scared, but ready to get rid of his rash.  On Monday morning, we took off the diaper and made the switch to underwear.  I took him to the potty about once an hour.  The first day, his main accomplishment was learning to hold his urine for hours at a time.  On the second day,  he started having actual successes.  By day four, he was wearing underwear overnight and by the end of the week, he used his first public restroom.  Potty training went sublimely once we made the plunge.  Granted, seven months later, Owen still asks if he can wear diapers, but he is fully trained.

I anticipate another year before we even attempt to train Benjamin, but I'm sure there are as many potty trainer personalities as there are potty trainers.  What kind of trainer was your child?

To start at the beginning of my potty training series, click here.

One Step Back

As far as I've experienced it, there are two varieties of potty training set-backs.  The first kind is not as much set-back as it is failure to start forward.  When I began potty training Gavin, I knew nothing about the process and we started several times with no luck.  We would put him in underwear and then find him playing in a puddle, unbothered by the mess.  We'd change him and remind him to use the potty and then find him wet again.  Instead of stressing, we took this as a sign that he was just not ready to make the potty training plunge and so we reverted back to diapers and waited. 

The second kind of set-back is a bit more perturbing, but as it has happened with each of my children, I consider it normal.  We begin with the intense week of potty training.  We make the switch to underwear full-time.  The child learns to follow body cues.  We take the trip to the bathroom multiple times a day.  We reward successes.  And then potty training is complete.  The hoop-la is over and the treats are put away.  The child is confident in their ability to make it to the potty on time, every time. 

And then the child gets too confident.  He waits awhile after he feels the urge to pee.  He keeps playing with his trains until the feeling reaches desperation.  He runs to the potty and he is too late.  I hear a little call of,  "Mama, I need help,"  and then I enter a puddle-y, wet bathroom. 

Or she realizes she needs to go, but doesn't want to stop eating lunch.  She finishes her sandwich before running to the bathroom.  She makes it onto the toilet, but damp underwear must be changed.  And it happens in the afternoon and before bed, too. 

Thankfully, this type of set-back is more frustrating than anything.  It doesn't usually mean the child is un-training.  It just means they need a little reminding to be consistent.   

To start at the beginning of my potty training series, click here. 
Up next: Potty Trainer Personalities

Pee-pee's and Zzz's

When I was potty training Gavin, I trained him for the day and the night at the same time.  I thought that was what you were supposed to do...and it worked.  Then I found out that many people day train and postpone night training until later, but having been successful in doing it all at once, I wasn't about to change my methods with later children! 

On the week we begin potty training, I give the child a day or two to get used to the process.  It is an intense time of running to the potty and learning to identify body cues and it is a relief for Mama and child to put on a diaper for bed.  But by Day Three or Four, the night training begins.  In our experience, after a few days of intense training, the child is very aware of the need to hold their pee-pee and this continues when they are sleeping.  By training during the day and not training for the night at the same time, I am afraid we would miss out on this ideal time of awareness.  If I taught them to go on the potty during the day, but pee-pee in their diapers at night, I would have to re-train later to do something that comes fairly easily now. 

Of course, even this method is not flawless and accidents do happen (more often with some children).  We prepare for the inevitable.  We try to limit excessive drinking in the hours before bed, but our children enjoy glasses of water by their beds so we don't make a big deal about how much they drink.  We make sure all the children potty right before bed.  Before I turn in for the night, I check on everyone and if anyone stirs, I ask if they need to use the potty again.  We also put extra padding under the sheets to soak up any puddles that appear in the night.  As soon as the potty training child wakes, we offer congratulations and head directly to the potty to begin the day's cycle. 

Interested in Part 1 of my potty training series?  Click here.
Up next: Potty training set-backs

This post was a participant in Works-For-Me Wednesday, hosted by We Are THAT Family.

The Wet Ocean

wet o·cean [wet oh-shuhn]

– adjective/noun

1. toddler description of the toilet water and how it felt when he touched it

Origin: 2009 Owen

*****

After a recent conversation with a friend about potty training, I was inspired to share how we go about the seemingly dreaded task at our house.  What is it about teaching children these necessary bathroom skills that strikes fear in our hearts?  Alas, after leading three children in the way of the potty, it does not seem so scary anymore.  A big task, to be sure, but nothing worth fretting over!

Our number one motto is, "Wait until they are ready!"  There is a lot of pressure to train early and while that may work for some, we've found that a few extra months in diapers saves tears and frustration for all involved.  Our boys trained around age three and Maddie was not quite two-and-a-half.  How do we know they are ready?  There are many ways to know and each child is different, but we looked for dry diapers most mornings, the child's awareness of bodily functions (hiding in the corner to poop, for example!), and their ability to climb onto the potty without lots of assistance.  Readiness doesn't always mean an obvious interest in the bathroom or toilet, but it does mean a definite ability to handle the task.  Potty training to us means training our children, not training ourselves.

Once a child is ready-- really ready-- to potty train, the process is fairly simple.  As soon as the child wakes up, we take them to the bathroom and change them into underwear.  We do not use Pull-ups or training underwear.  We transition directly into underwear.  Throughout the day, we remind them to use the potty about once an hour.  Sometimes they are able to go, sometimes they aren't, but we make sure there are ample opportunities to try and less chance for mess! Any time they are sucessful, we reward them with one small candy (an M&M or chocolate chip).  Pooping earns two candies.  Day One usually brings multiple accidents as the child is realizing how to follow body cues. We try to treat the accidents casually and keep on the schedule of taking the child to the bathroom a regular intervals.  Each day gets easier and before the week is over, we have a mostly-trained child.  When training is complete, the candy treats end.

When Gavin (our first) was training, we used a traditional toddler potty chair.  It was convenient, but we found that then we had to had to then take time to transition him to the adult toilet.  Plus we met with hesitation from him when he needed to use a public restroom.  With Maddie and Owen, we chose to train on the adult toilet with the aid of a child-sized potty seat.

During this time of intense training we do several things. 

1. We stay home as much as possible.  If we leave the house, we have to switch back to diapers and this sends mixed messages.  We prefer to keep the underwear on all day.
2. After a day or two, we keep underwear on the child during naps.  When they are training, we have found that they are ultra-aware of needing to use the bathroom and usually stay dry during a moderate time of sleep.
3. We begin night-training simultaneously.  (cue scary music)

Up next: How to combine pee-pee and getting your zzz's. 

My Failed Attempt

When I first began my blog, I shared about new ventures into cloth diapering here and here. I realized recently that I never followed up with our results: I gave up!

I'm almost ashamed to admit it, but it just was not working out. I'm not sure if I should have given it more time or dug deeper to find solutions to our problems or what, but I'll use the excuse that I was pregnant and not up to the challenge.

The extra laundry was not a problem because I don't mind laundry. I do it everyday anyway and I actually enjoy folding it. Going out with cloth was much easier than I expected so I didn't really find cloth diapering inconvenient. However, I had a smell issue.

No matter how I washed the diaper covers, no matter what temperature water I used or how I rinsed them, I could not get rid of a stinky, stale odor. The diapers themselves (which actually touch the skin and absorb the...well, the body excretions) smelled fine, but the covers got so bad I couldn't get past the gross factor. Add to that the fact that Owen got a bad diaper rash that we still battle off and on (possibly unrelated?)...and I just called it quits.

Hi, my name is Kristin and I use disposables.

Update on Our Diapering Experiment

We've been cloth diapering now for about 2 weeks. Going into it, I had several concerns so I thought now was a good time to share each one and the results.

1)Extra Laundry-- This has almost been a non-issue. I do so much laundry anyway with 3 little kids and a hubby who works outside that I don't even notice one extra load every 2-3 days.

2)Leaks-- So far, we have had NO leaks. Even with the cheapy covers that I have, we have had not one leak or piece of wet clothing. One day this week I was extremely busy and neglected to change Owen's diaper for...well, a long time. The diaper was sagging terrible, but still not a drop elsewhere.

3)Having to Change Diapers Much More Frequently-- I have to change him slightly more often, but nothing drastic. And as noted above, even when I forget, it works out okay!

4)Odor-- The diapers themselves have been fine. The covers however seem to retain odor. It isn't a BAD smell, just a stale smell. I'm not sure what to do differently about that. Maybe it would help to have more covers so they could air out more in between uses.

5)Storage of Soiled Diapers-- Since this began as an experiment, I didn't want to invest in a diaper pail yet. I've been keeping the wet diapers and the rinsed-out poopy ones together with the used covers in a plastic grocery bag in the hamper. It has worked out fine as long as I keep the bag folded over to contain the smell.

The one thing I didn't count on was diaper rash. I've read that babies who wear cloth rarely have diaper rash. Even the extra moisture next to their bodies is better for their skin than the chemicals in disposables. However, Owen got a yucky rash last week and we switched to disposables for a day. It didn't come back when we went back to cloth so maybe it was just a coincidence. Not sure.

I'm still not decided on whether we will stick with cloth for Owen or whether we will use cloth for the new baby. But for now, we'll keep plugging on.

A Diapering Experiment

We are in the middle of an experiment in our house. Well, I guess it would be better to say Owen and I are in the middle of an experiment. I have been interested in cloth diapers for awhile. Since I knew nothing about them, I started extensive research. That's how I am. If I want to know about something, I jump in all the way. Cloth diapering has moved beyond rubber pants and pins and there are so many, many options now.

For months now, I've been reading articles, scouring catalogs, checking the internet, asking questions. I found a book at the library with tons of info. My sister-in-law even sent me a short video demo showing how she diapers her baby with cloth. They live across the country so I can't watch in person! :-(

The last thing I did was submit a help question to a magazine I subscribe to and got loads of response for moms who currently use cloth diapers. Two of the ladies even gave me gently-used prefolds they are done with. Then I won a few brand new diaper covers from ebay for less that $2 a piece including shipping (a real bargain considering a cover can cost $10-12 plus shipping retail.)

This week, I decided to try it out. So far we've had success. No leaks yet. I'm starting slow so Owen wore disposables to bed, but one disposable a day is still not bad. We're hoping to save a few pennies and maybe even help out with potty-training. (They say cloth expedites training.)

Here a photo of my happy boy modeling his new look!